The Secret Sexual Basement

What the heck is this you may ask? The last three years have been quite the learning curve for us as we explore the complexities of infidelity, secrets, lies, duality, and narcissistic abusive behaviours. It’s a learning curve that I never imagined I’d be on—in saying this—I’m thankful that both Dave and I possess aContinue reading “The Secret Sexual Basement”

The Role of Spirituality in Recovery

I’ve always believed that we humans are spiritual beings encompassed in a temporal body, a little similar to an envelope that carries a letter inside. The envelope has a purpose although it’s the letter that contains all of the really important stuff. I’m unashamedly Christian and also unashamedly imperfect. My faith is what has sustainedContinue reading “The Role of Spirituality in Recovery”

Original Preface

Our harshest critic aka most constructive Beta Reader gave the feedback that this preface was “good but too long…” So although some of what you’re about to read is in our final copy, this is the entire unedited version that didn’t make the cut. I hope you can take something of value away from it.Continue reading “Original Preface”

Becoming Safe

The only mistake that will destroy you, is the one you won’t admit to. I’m the last one to call an affair a mistake, I mean earthquakes and cyclones happen, you accidentally step in dog poo or brush your teeth with shaving cream instead of toothpaste, but no one just happens to cheat on theirContinue reading “Becoming Safe”

Who or What Do We Hang Our Hope On?

I’d love to begin with a Happy New Year blog but there’s a burden stirring within so I’m going with that! Over the past twelve months, the world of affair recovery has seen three power couples (for the lack of a better term) sorrowfully reach a point of separation. For those of us who haveContinue reading “Who or What Do We Hang Our Hope On?”

With Humility & Gratitude

This is our final blog post for 2021, and wow, what a year it’s been. On top of becoming a first-time co-author, I studied full time and successfully completed a Diploma of Counselling through the Australian Institute of Family Counselling. I’m planning to put this to work in 2022! Here’s a sneak peek at myContinue reading “With Humility & Gratitude”

Dear Unfaithful

Dear unfaithful, There’s probably a lot in this that you’re not going to want to hear—but you really need to if you want to begin to understand what’s happened. Imagine that you’ve just dropped a nuclear bomb on your marriage, your spouse, yourself and your family.  The world as you once knew has been annihilated—napalmed—andContinue reading “Dear Unfaithful”

Dearest Betrayed

You didn’t deserve this… You did nothing to cause it and there is nothing that you could have done differently to prevent it from happening. Your partners’ betrayal had nothing to do with you, heck it didn’t even have anything to do with the other person/s or object/s they chose to betray you with. SoContinue reading “Dearest Betrayed”

What is Infidelity?

Dr Frank Pittman describes infidelity as “the keeping of secrets”. The longer Dave and I are on this recovery journey, the more we learn about ourselves and others, and the more we connect with betrayed or unfaithful men and women—the more we align with Frank’s description as being truth. If you’ve read our Memoir you’llContinue reading “What is Infidelity?”

Can Leopards Change Their Spots?

Once a Narc, Always a Narc? I’m not so sure. This kind of thinking is too black and white for me and I feel that the mindset only encourages unaccountability and a victim mentality. 2 Timothy 1:7 tells us that “God did not give us a spirit of timidity or cowardice or fear, but (HeContinue reading “Can Leopards Change Their Spots?”

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