“He Had it Coming”

Some time ago I wrote The Moment of Impact quoting experiences of many betrayed partners around the world. In my opinion, society, culture and media do a lousy job conveying the reality and intensity of trauma and suffering inflicted upon loved ones in the wake of intimate betrayal. The consequences of infidelity, betrayal and addiction… Continue reading “He Had it Coming”

30th Wedding Anniversary

2/10/1993 was the day we exchanged vows committing our relationship of 3 years to “til death do us part”. Beyond Betrayal; 28 Years, Lies-Deceit-Infidelity tells the whole story. So here we are 30 years married and just over 4 years into recovery, celebrating a milestone that I never thought we’d see after our 2018 separation.… Continue reading 30th Wedding Anniversary

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year ❤️‍🩹

A wounded heart often struggles to live up to expectations of the Christmas season. If your heart is hurting, grappling to find joy in the midst of trauma, please be kind to yourself. Do what you must do but not more than need to and remember that it’s ok to say “no” to things that… Continue reading The Most Wonderful Time of the Year ❤️‍🩹

Becoming Safe

The only mistake that will destroy you, is the one you won’t admit to. I’m the last one to call an affair a mistake, I mean earthquakes and cyclones happen, you accidentally step in dog poo or brush your teeth with shaving cream instead of toothpaste, but no one just happens to cheat on their… Continue reading Becoming Safe

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Real Time Recovery

If you’ve read our Memoir you’ll know right from the start that Dave nor I profess to have ‘arrived’ anywhere, we are still very much in the thick of this recovery journey. It’s taken us a lifetime to get to this starting point so it’s likely going to take us another lifetime to complete it!… Continue reading Real Time Recovery

Sobering Figures

I recently stumbled across the Sexual Health Australia site while meandering down the research rabbit hole. According to this organisation, Australia’s prevalence of extra-marital affairs is that a whopping 60% of men and 45% of women are willing to report that infidelity has occurred sometime in their marriage. They actually suggest that an accurate figure… Continue reading Sobering Figures

The Infidelity Car Crash; The Carnage of Infidelity

Photo by Thought Catalog on Pexels.com

*Content warning; this is a creative writing piece describing how the first 18 months of recovery felt for me, I’ve used some strong imagery that may be an emotional trigger for others who are on a similar journey. Please proceed with caution. You’re cruising down a long straight stretch of country road in this car… Continue reading The Infidelity Car Crash; The Carnage of Infidelity

How Do I Get Out of This Place?

Where do unfaithful men and women turn for help when the world around them implodes? Men in particular don’t like asking for directions when we’re lost and believe it or not, betraying my wife is never a road I thought I’d end up on, so if we have no idea how we got here how… Continue reading How Do I Get Out of This Place?

When is a D-day, not a D-day?

We had church in our home last Sunday, it was a small intimate gathering with people of deep faith. After everyone left, Dave and I put the furniture back in place and had a couple of hours before meeting friends for lunch. I told Dave I was going upstairs to lay down to read for… Continue reading When is a D-day, not a D-day?

Nail that shame to the cross!

Guilt and shame are two very different feelings. Guilt says “I’ve done something bad” shame says, “I AM BAD!” Guilt propels you to rectify your wrongdoing, shame keeps you trapped in a negative cycle of self loathing, self soothing, self focus, self, self, self. Shame is all about YOU but not in a healthy way…… Continue reading Nail that shame to the cross!

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